Every now and then I look around for other sites like mine. Not that there are any site just like mine. What would the odds be on that? No I just look for other sites that cover the hotel/audit topic. So now and then I do a google search for night audit just to see what I can find. Mostly I find links to sites that really are not what I’m looking for. And of course I’m usually in the top 10 in this google search.

This time when I did my search I found another site. I found Nightaudit.com. A forum that’s set up for people just like me. They currently only have 9 registered user and a total of 2 post (one is mine) and I felt like maybe just maybe I could shift them a little hits by writing about them. Because I know what it’s like to not get a lot of visitors. My first five years were like that. I’ve already informed my forum guys about the place. It would be nice to get some kind of community going regarding this line of work.

But let’s be clear on what my idea of a community should be. Gawain sums it up perfectly in this aim chat excerpt:

[00:27] Gawain: lol. its like the luke skywalker to your darth vader.
[00:28] Gawain: you’re all like.. luke… I am your FUTURE!
[00:28] Gawain: and they’re all like.. NOOOOOOOOO
[00:28] Turk: according to whois it’s been registered since 04
[00:28] Gawain: lol. with zero posts?
[00:28] Gawain: jesus, you shouldn’t even bother.
[00:28] Turk: first post there is from 2/6
[00:28] Turk: yeah
[00:28] Turk: well
[00:28] Turk: what the hell
[00:29] Turk: a community type thing has always been my goal
[00:29] Turk: just tainted with hate of course
[00:30] Gawain: lol. and a pinch of disgust.

I’m not interested in management. Nor do I want to maintain any kind of management friendly vibe in any community I happen to be a part of. I think that (taking a quote form Alan Moore’s V for Vendetta):

Employees should not be afraid of their managers. Managers should be afraid of their Employees.

That would be the basis of any community on the net for night auditors that I would have a part in. Which really is what my website is all about really. I’m sure that anyone who frequents my site probably already knows this. I’m sure as that website grows and picks up some people we will find out just what kind of place it will become. Either way if your an night auditor be sure to head over there and sign up so we can see what kind of community it will become.

On a side note if your idea of a night audit community falls in line with mine make sure to visit my night audit forum and register for my forums. We have over 20 members and over 700 posts. Which until Nightaudit.com gets going you can be sure to find a little more activity in my forums.

[03:52] Turk: Shithole Inn plans for future
[03:52] Gawain: is that you?
[03:52] Turk: yep
[03:53] Gawain: hows that cattails?
[03:53] Turk: Colleen Vivian is a twat
[03:53] Turk: it sucks bad
[03:53] Gawain: aw
[03:53] Gawain: but it serves good home cooked food at an afordable price!
[03:53] Turk: bad food
[03:53] Turk: worse service
[03:53] Turk: jesus
[03:54] Turk: that end of the building would be burned down if I was in charge
[03:54] Gawain: Vivian currently is working on her master’s degree with the American Intercontinental University online. She received her bachelor’s degree from them in business management, with emphasis in marketing. HAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAHAHAHAHA
[03:54] Turk: yeah
[03:54] Turk: she’s a twat
[03:54] Gawain: holy crap dude. the Intercontinental University Online
[03:54] Gawain: seriously.
[03:54] Gawain: god I wouldn’t want that published.
[03:54] Turk: heh
[03:54] Gawain: Id just say I was getting my degree.
[03:55] Turk: well she is working for the bottom of the barrel
[03:55] Gawain: This whole article is written poorly. I wonder if I should call your hotel up and ask them If they need a new public relations manager.
[03:55] Gawain: because jesus christ.
[03:55] Turk: no such thing
[03:56] Turk: thats as good as the daily news gets
[03:56] Gawain: I can’t believe she referred to your area as “working class”
[03:56] Turk: heh
[03:56] Gawain: thats rule number fucking one.
[03:56] Gawain: you NEVER put your customers in a “class”
[03:56] Gawain: jesus.
[03:56] Turk: twat
[03:56] Gawain: what makes me sad is that she probably makes more than me.
[03:56] Turk: god
[03:57] Turk: don’t make me think about that
[03:57] Gawain: lol
[03:57] Turk: a twat makes more than me
[03:57] Gawain: her plans include adding a new vending area? THAT IS HER BIG PLAN? ANOTHER GODDAMN SNACK MACHINE??!
[03:57] Turk: no
[03:57] Turk: there are no snack machines in the hotel
[03:57] Turk: none
[03:58] Turk: as it is now
[03:58] Gawain: it says shes adding a new vending area.
[03:58] Turk: yeah sure
[03:58] Turk: when?
[03:58] Gawain: I guess that could be a little in-house shop or something.
[03:58] Turk: news to me
[03:58] Gawain: lol. its you.
[03:58] Gawain: they’re gonna give you some boxes of candy bars to sell.
[03:58] Turk: we have a “gift shop”
[03:58] Gawain: HAHAHAHAH
[03:58] Turk: they are open 7am-11pm
[03:58] Turk: thats it
[03:58] Gawain: “we’re adding a new vending area. Here he is now, working behind the desk.”
[03:58] Gawain: HAHAHAHHAHA
[03:59] Gawain: “hey vending area, go peddle these candybars”
[03:59] Gawain: im dying
[03:59] Gawain: hahahahaahaha
[03:59] Gawain: I can see you wearing a little paper hat
[03:59] Gawain: hahahahahahahah
[03:59] Turk: not very funny from were I’m sitting
[03:59] Gawain: HAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAHAHAHHHAHAHAhihagovrebaw
[04:00] Gawain: oh jesus. oh god. hahahah
[04:00] Gawain: I woke meg up. shit.
[04:00] Turk: heh
[04:01] Gawain: I can’t explain to her why this is so funny.
[04:01] Turk: heh
[04:02] Turk: it’s not funny

Fired again. It’s official. Damn near word for word transcription of the recorded phone conversation.

Sheriff: Good afternoon this is the Sheriff.
Turk: Hi Sheriff this is Turk.
Sheriff: Hey yeah.
Turk: Hey I checked the schedule last night. I’m not on the… I don’t have time on the schedule.
Sheriff: Oh yeah, I guess I… I guess I forgot to put you on the schedule.
Turk: So I’d.. Just you know… Am I working or not?
Sheriff: Umm… No actually, no your not working.
Turk: Yeah er. Could you care to explain?
Sheriff: Yeah I will explain. Actually I was going to be in here tonight anyways. But uh, the powers to be have decided to let you go.
Turk: So I’ve been fired?
Sheriff: Um. Yeah. I… I’d… If you want to put it in that sense. Yes. It wasn’t my decision. But they’ve let you go.
Turk: What was the reasoning for my being let go?
Sheriff: Well like I say. The powers that be let you go.
Turk: Was there a reason or did just decided just to just let me go?
Turk: Theres got to be a reason.
Sheriff: I think part of it was just to let you go. I think they they deemed that the morale of the team would be better without you.
Turk: (laughing to myself) Ok.
Turk: Alright I guess that works.
Sheriff: Yeah. But um. But no I didn’t want to see you go. But of course my vote was out voted by everybody else.
Turk: No of course. Of course. Thank you Sheriff.
Sheriff: But no. Because I think. I think your one hell of an auditor and I can work with you. I don’t care what your attitude is or anything like that. I just said your a hell of an auditor and I can work around all… all your attitudes and stuff like that.
Turk: (laughing again) Well I think my attitudes justified.
Sheriff: Yeah. And I agree also.
Turk: Ok well thanks Sheriff you have a good day.
Sheriff: You do the same Turk
Turk: Yeah I’ll try.
Sheriff: Ok.

The Sheriff ladies and gentlemen. Give him a round of applause for that performance. Bravo!

Update
Here is the mp3 of the above conversation:

Fired Again (1.8 MiB, 32 hits)

Fuck him. I think the sheriff has to be heard. Just so one can understand the magnitude of his pussy factor.

I’ve never talked to someone who sells money/powerleveling for mmo’s before. So when one looked me up I of course had questions I wanted to ask.

[02:32] Brogame: HI
[02:32] Turk: hi
[02:32] Brogame: are you the webmaster of Hotelblues.com/wow/ ?
[02:33] Turk: yes
[02:33] Brogame: does your site talk about the online games, such as WOW ?
[02:34] Turk: my main site talks about all kinds of things. Including games like wow. the page your asking about is pretty much done with as it was for a guild that is now defunct
[02:36] Brogame: ok, did there have some advertising on your site about online games before ?
[02:36] Turk: just google ads
[02:36] Brogame: oh, I see

I thought it was funny that the farmer didn’t come right out and say what it was he wanted to advertise on my site. I did know in advance that this im conversation was coming as the farmer sent me an email first. So I had to ask what the farmer wanted because the dude would have beat around the bush all day.

[02:36] Turk: what are you selling?
[02:37] Brogame: we sell the game currency and leveling, we provide the best service all over the world
[02:37] Turk: I’ve never really done much with advertising
[02:37] Turk: what site do you run? that does all of this?
[02:38] Brogame: after browsing your site, we have a plan to advertising on your site, so do you accept this kind of advertising ?
[02:38] Turk: depends.
[02:38] Turk: whats your url?
[02:38] Brogame: http://www.brogame.com/
[02:39] Brogame: this is our site, we have so many old customers now, I think both of us will earn much more through this case

(more…)

This shit starts out harmlessly.

[12:59] Gawain: Korn’s Another Brick In The Wall im not particularly a Korn fan, but they did a very nice cover of Another Brick In The Wall.
[1:00] Turk: korn?
[1:00] Gawain: yeah.
[1:00] Gawain: they covered a pink floyd song. and I have to say they did it really well.
[1:00] Turk: covering another brick in the wall?
[1:00] Gawain: yup.
[1:00] Gawain: just watch it.
[1:01] Turk: no
[1:03] Gawain: that site is awesome, btw.

Which makes me look around and I find some Doctor Who divx videos. Which leads to this conversation:

[2:31] Turk: The Mind Robbers second doctor story
[2:31] Turk: zoe was the hottest companion
[2:31] Turk: dig the photo copy backgrounds in the tardis console room in the begining
[2:31] Turk: got to love the 60’s bbc
[2:32] Gawain: you are such a goddamn fanboy.
[2:38] Turk: yeah
[2:42] Turk: Zoe honestly
[2:42] Turk: hot
[2:43] Turk: and she would wear these skin tight outfits
[2:43] Turk: man
[2:50] Gawain: the wife asked what I was looking at, I explained, she rolled her eyes and called you a nerd.
[2:50] Turk: …
[2:50] Gawain: heh.
[2:50] Gawain: and then went to bed.
[2:51] Turk: remind her when she gets up that at least I’m not some larping faggot
[2:51] Gawain: HAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA
[2:51] Gawain: holy shit, that is the ultimate trump card.
[2:51] Turk: thank you
[2:51] Turk: I didn’t want to do it
[2:51] Turk: but I had to
[2:51] Gawain: heh.
[2:51] Gawain: you totally bypassed cruise missiles and went straight to nukes.

For those who want to see what I’m talking about, here is a thumbnailed picture (that I made Gawain check out) of the Second Doctor‘s companion Zoe Heriot mentioned above:

Because these really are so easy. The last time I shocked Gawain like this it was my confession of disliking the Blue Man Group and that Jack Nicholson is a bad Joker.

[06:03] Gawain: lotion hee. I forgot about this.
[06:04] Gawain: I need to download the mp3 again.
[06:07] Turk: what is it?
[06:07] Turk: why do I want to watch it?
[06:07] Gawain: its the greenskeepers signing “it puts the lotion in the basket”
[06:07] Gawain: its OOOOOOLD.
[06:07] Turk: ahah
[06:07] Turk: ok
[06:07] Gawain: but still awesome.
[06:08] Turk: you lost me at greenskeepers
[06:08] Gawain: what?
[06:08] Turk: never heard of it/them
[06:08] Turk: this another weirdo german speed metal band?
[06:09] Gawain: no, not at all.
[06:09] Gawain: its acoustic guitar I think.
[06:09] Turk: ok looked it up on wikipedia
[06:10] Gawain: its just a funny goddamn song. christ.
[06:10] Turk: ok
[06:10] Turk: sorry
[06:10] Gawain: you’d think I sent you furry porn at some point or something.
[06:10] Turk: come on you know me. billy joel and frank sinatra
[06:10] Turk: musically challenged I’ve been called
[06:11] Gawain: well this is funny and you should watch it if you haven’t seen it. it came out like a couple years ago, but its still good. especially if you’re a silence of the lambs fan.
[06:11] Gawain: which I am.
[06:11] Turk: I’ve never seen it
[06:12] Gawain: hah hah. thats really funny. hah. not seen silence of the lambs. man you almost had me there.
[06:12] Turk: honestly
[06:12] Turk: hand to god
[06:12] Gawain: but… its one of the classics of modern cinema!
[06:12] Gawain: anthony fuckin’ hopkins!
[06:13] Turk: yeah I know of it
[06:13] Turk: just not seen it
[06:13] Turk: not really up my alley
[06:14] Turk: I’ve shattered your perception of me again, haven’t I?
[06:14] Gawain: …. HOW CAN THIS BEEEEEEE?!
[06:14] Gawain: shit, and now I have to go to work.
[06:14] Gawain: DOWNLOAD THE FUCKING MOVIE.
[06:14] Gawain: and watch it.
[06:14] Turk: in fact
[06:14] Turk: the line
[06:14] Turk: rubs the lotion on its skin, or else it gets the hose again
[06:14] Turk: I know from an episode of family guy
[06:14] Gawain: omg.
[06:14] Gawain: I can’t talk to you anymore.
[06:15] Gawain: jesus. download the movie. watch it. jesus. never… seen… jesus christ. how could you… have… gaaaaaaaaaaagh
[06:15] Turk: I’m just not into serial killers
[06:15] Turk: sorry

Not only have I not seen The Silence of the Lambs, I never seen any of the sequels either. I’m just not into these kinds of movies.

Here is my chat with the Hotel Insider. We cover a few topics of interest regarding the worst hotel ever. What happened when the cops came to talk to me. What the hotel is like now. The newb auditor turned into a front desk supervisor. And a shared dislike for the biggest douche bag in the universe.

[3:31] Turk: you work at the desk?
[3:32] Hotel Insider: no
[3:32] Hotel Insider: I did do night audit before though at another hotel
[3:32] Turk: how did you find out about my site?
[3:32] Hotel Insider: back when you were fired and they were all investigating you etc
[3:32] Hotel Insider: actually when I seen your site
[3:32] Hotel Insider: I was like.. “man wish I could of met that guy he sounds pretty cool”
[3:33] Turk: wow did they make a big deal out of it?
[3:33] Hotel Insider: cause of the the idiots who stole crap from regal beloit
[3:33] Turk: oh
[3:33] Turk: right that shit
[3:33] Turk: heh
[3:33] Hotel Insider: well, we had just got regal beloit again for banquets
[3:33] Hotel Insider: and they were doing like meetings for this new program they paid a mil for or something for managers
[3:34] Hotel Insider: well these 3 people that use to work there I’m pretty sure stole this like big chest that they would keep there laptops in for the trainees
[3:34] Turk: yeah
[3:34] Hotel Insider: and they were watching you and seeing what you were posting etc seeing if maybe you were the one who did it

(more…)